Does being small mean that we’ll not be noticed?

Most of us resent feeling small. We think we would be better of if we were, big, tall, monstrous, fearsome.

I don’t know why, but we love feeling like we are dangerous–in some way a potential hazard to the world around us; believing that if we are, we have to fear, but something we have to manage.

I guess we like to feel like we need to be cared for or protected; it’s not that the ideal picture this points to is not appealing, it’s just that we’re too well aware that this ideal is not our picture.

We want something more real than a fantasy to hold onto. We crave something to nourish our souls; and that something must be real. But, if we cannot find something or someone to nourish our souls, we will do what we can to nourish ourselves. This is senseless, and yet we do it as a means to survive. We cut off the life feed and try to keep ourselves alive on what we already have inside.

It is a mistake, but we all do it. We do it until we find another way. We do it as long as we value life–as we know it or as we want to know it–more than God. But, when we value God more than life we have both. We don’t strive to get what we need because we have taken ourselves out of the world’s keeping and put ourselves back in God’s keeping. We realize it is a matter of allegiance. The allegiance we had before was wrong. Wrong in that God was not present in it and He could not be honored by it. Wrong in that it did not have the power to work good at all.

But the new alliance we embrace now is honoring to God and marked by His presence. This is so because it has been created by Christ. Christ in His greatness joined Himself with us who are small. He showed us in the most meaningful way that we are not forgotten and we have no need to seek out love in broken places anymore. Christ made love His banner and His mission reconciliation between the One Lover and His beloved.

Christ came to our world and called us in the name of our Father. He came to join us with Himself so that we could be at peace with God again. For those who believe in the accomplishment of His mission, our sin has been settled in Christ’s penalty-bearing death and that sin once kept us in rebellion can no more rule our hearts. With hearts that are always being made softer towards God, we witness the ideal slowly emerge out of the throws of redemption. And, indeed we find that if being small is not a concern for Him, it will surely work for us!



Wikipedia: A is the first letter and a vowel in the ISO basic Latin alphabet. Wikipedia: Can may refer to: The term ‘can’ entered the vernacular some time at the turn of the century, it was first used when beer was predominately drunk out of cans, drinkers would refer to a beer as a can eg ‘pass us a can thanks Liv’.

If you’re living for Satan, surely he doesn’t have to worry about whether you’re living for God.

If you consider disobedience to God as a viable option for you at this time, please also consider the correlation to your obedience to Satan. God says in His Word that we cannot serve two masters. We will either throw all of our service towards the one and offer the other nothing or we will despise the demands of one and love those of the other (Matt. 6:24). We only have two choices. If we are treating God in a certain manner, we can be sure we are treating Satan in an equally opposite manner. So be careful where your heart is invested!

If you consider God’s ways to be all-inclusive with its greatest stream of blessing not reaching you first, but refreshing the Master earlier, don’t be surprised! Doesn’t Satan offer you the same terms in his own contract? That he will be your god of choice even while he deceives you into thinking that you are truly the only god in the arrangement?

God is not so underhanded. He does not seek to elevate your ego to get you to follow Him. He very simply declares to you that He is God and you are to be His servant. I understand that this is hard for us to swallow with all our high-flung dreams of making and being the big-time all by ourselves, but we must face reality.

If we are giving in to Satan in any way (so that we may avoid giving in to Christ) we are poising ourselves on a very dangerous incline. We must know that this slope was not designed to keep us in the same place for longer than it takes to land there. Satan is all about moving us along; getting us in position for more and more destruction.

His reasoning is that if he can get you to do everything he puts in front of you–things which you call “no big deal” he has won your allegiance for far weightier things he has in mind.

He doesn’t start out trying to get you to commit the big sins outright; he first tries to get you to test your freedom and unwittingly commit yourself to finding it along the avenues he suggests to you. This is not an accident; therefore, we can not live accidentally.

We must live aware of our two prospective masters and choose one with our eyes wide-open. How do you do this? Go directly to God’s Word and get the official debriefing on the two because, believe me, Satan doesn’t have a manual out there detailing his secrets and uncovering God’s. There really is only one place you can go. And I wouldn’t wait too long before you do!


When I’m not looking up, I fall down

“Am I good enough?” Have you ever asked yourself that? “Will I measure up? Can I ever do what is expected of me, or will I disappoint all of us? Oh, and how will I ever live with myself again if I do?!”

I have asked myself those questions. I wish I could say all of these “self-doubts” were just a distant memory, but they’re not. When I feel like it really counts, that I really want to do well, than I remember all the right wrong thoughts to keep me worried so much that I lose my focus.

I want to be the best person I can be, but what does that look like, and at what cost must it be achieved? I am ashamed that I am still so much of my own glory-hound. I want to feel good only by looking good. And I will pay most costs that are put in front of me.

I will worry; I will think more about myself than I typically do; I will get anxious and irritable, even snapping at my family; I will insist on having my way and see no other way to enjoy myself now unless I can guarantee that later I shall be a success in all eyes including my own.

Certain peoples eyes are more difficult to light up than others, and those are often the ones that are more important to me. But they don’t always have to be. Sometimes I worry the most about eyes that light up pretty regularly. I ask myself, “What if they feel like I’ve changed; what if how I acted in a certain situation is remembered with disapproval to the same degree that I recall the embarrassment.

Okay, so my pride is really blowing up here — I hate disappointment. I feel like I can handle anything of this kind from other people, but not from myself. The disappointment I cause myself — which is always ratcheted up by fears that I have permanently lost the respect that I covet so much from others — is one of the most difficult things for me to handle.

In fact, I fear I don’t handle them at all really. If I did, I would get to the root of this disturbance of the heart and give it to God just as well as I could. If the symptoms were persistent still, then I would keep digging, realizing that this was not a small thing that God was laying on my conscience — He wants a big contribution of repentance for an equally large sum of sin.

This realization doesn’t scare me much any more, it is the fact that I still go so long without it. I think I can handle my heart on my own; that all I need is to get my own way and I’ll be fine. Won’t I get it? That is not the way — things are not as simple as being able to believe everything my lying flesh tells me!

I need to face this arbitrary nonsense and turn from listening to it to heeding something stronger, something more vital to my existence. Something I can only call the Word of God and the constant affirmation of His Holy Spirit. I can go on in this life alone! All I’m good at in the natural (being under my own power) is going in circles because Christ is the only One who is capable of moving my stagnant, sinning self forward.

Forward into more of a view of grace, more of an experience of His glory, more of a dependence on His mercy. God is what I need to be assured of, and the rest of life can be what it will be. And I can live with whatever that is — I just need to remind myself to stand on the truth of who God is and not the fickle framework of who I am — which will always be a dangerous lie without Christ at the head.