How do you express your rebellion? Do you hold it in and try to “take it” for as long as you can? Do you think rebellion is only bad when you express it publicly? Do you think you can get away with it as long as it stays buried inside?
My friend, that is the worst place for rebellion to be hidden? It doesn’t belong in your heart. God sees it and how well He knows that it composes the essence of everything you do. You cannot live with it. You cannot pretend it doesn’t exist. You cannot dismiss it as though it were a passive element of who you are.
It is not. It wars for control of your soul. For your dominion in your relationship with Christ. That’s right, you may be in rebellion, but you still have a relationship with Christ. There is an element of give and take between you and God, as is the case for every human (not just every Christian).
Your relationship may not be pleasant, may not be beneficial for either you or Him, but as long as you both shall live there is a link between the two of you. He created you and you bear His image–be it a crumpled one because of sin. And His heart is concerned with everything about you, though He may not have the freedom to let you know how deep those concerns go.
Rebellion in us is the greatest barrier to relationship with the God for which we were specifically made. This does not seem to be much of a hardship to us, except if, perhaps, we come to realize how this compromises our identities. It doesn’t make God any different, but it surely makes us different. While we grow into grotesque versions of the people He meant us to be, He grows more beautiful still.
He lays Himself down. He makes Himself nothing and He takes on our sin as a robe for His love-troubled soul. He abandons Himself to the Father’s wrath so that we might be released from it. He receives the wealth of hell that was supposed to be the inheritance of our future. He sets us free–if only we will look at Him. If only we will see what our sin has done to Him and what heart allowed this to be so. If only we cry out in anguish over the safety He denied Himself so we would not be left alone and rejected. Oh, what love is this! How can we deny it or turn away from it? Truly, we are dead souls if it does not break our hearts and lift our eyes with wonder.